Life with a Newborn- month 1

The pace of our lives has changed.
However, the direction has not.

Week 1-2
Upon delivering our son, our lives have been filled with such joy and happiness. Many moments I catch myself just staring at him. I would probably be amazed at the amount of time I had been staring at him until I catch myself. Oftentimes the crick in my neck proves the fact that it might have been longer than a minute! Already, there have been so many proud moments as we celebrate his milestones like holding up his head and turning it to the right and to the left. I know these are just the beginning too. Of course there have also been moments of laughter as we listen to his hiccups that sound like a squeaky dog toy. I find listening to them to be enjoyable as it reminds me of when I felt them while he was in the womb. From the first moment I was able to hold him, I was amazed and couldn't believe he was ours. Ever since then I've been full of thanks. We've prayed so many years for a child and he has already been such a blessing. Every day I was sick was totally worth it. It's been more overwhelming than not. However, it's overwhelming in the fact that we are in love with this new little boy. I wondered what life would be like with a child. I also wondered what Jeremy would be like with a child. He has shared with me over the years he indeed has a love for children but he likes it when they can walk and talk. Understandably so. Newborns seem so fragile. It's easy to think you will "break" someone's child, so I can see why he's always seemed nervous around them. However, as I laid in the hospital bed and saw him hold our son those first few days I couldn't help but want to savor those moments forever. The grin on his face showed such love.

However with joy, there often comes sadness and confusion. These moments come as we have tried to distinguish the difference between cries. Is it pangs of hunger or is it boredom? It is an upset stomach or is there other pain? Although one of his cries brings laughter, it is so pitiful at the same time. One day Miriam and I were taking a few pictures of him and he raised his head and scratched his head on the lever of the travel trunk. He screamed and it made me so sad. Yes, I was the one that caused his first itty-bitty scab on his head at 6 days old. I felt so badly, but I guess the sadness doesn't get easier the longer he is in pristine condition. He then got a little rash on his back and shoulders. When we asked the pediatrician about it she commented on how common they are in newborns as they come and go as they get used to laying in different positions or on different fabrics. Either way, the rash also made me a little sad even though it didn't seem to bother him one bit. Just as she said, it was there one day and gone the next. Phew. Up until that point, everything seemed perfect with the minor things here and there, but at 2 weeks, he started crying a lot more and it was hard to figure out what was wrong with him. Knowing we had changed his diaper and that he had been fed recently, we knew it was something else. The tears in his eyes, yes they were tears made me want to cry too because I didn't know what was wrong. After giving him some gas drops, he seemed to be better, but the whole thing about trying to figure out what I ate to make his stomach hurt is beyond me. I try to watch what I eat, but that's all I can do. I also wanted him to be a self-soother, but that's not always something a 14 day old baby can do! We are now part of the pacifier parents. It was an inner battle we fought (mainly me- I somehow thought I would be a bad parent if I gave him a pacifier). Anyway, we introduced the pacifier and he loves it. He often has a death grip on it though so don't be alarmed if you can't pull it out! So when you see us around, you will know a pacifier isn't too far behind... just in case.

Week 2-3
We've had lots of visitors since we've been home (well to be honest, we've had visitors almost nonstop since he was born). If you have visited, THANK YOU!!! There have only been a few days, actually 3, where it's just been us. It's really helped make this a great transition into parenthood though. We've been so thankful for all the meals and visitors. He's been so good with all the people too. I told him that being good will cause him to have more visitors in the future! At this point in the story he loves to be awake much more than he loves to be asleep. He's awake more hours than the average newborn. There are times where he seems to fight sleep. Hm... that's most of the time. His eyes will open and close and open and close. We rock. We talk. We tell stories. We sing. We listen to music. We swaddle. We re-swaddle. We cuddle. We sing some more. Finally, at some point he will fall asleep. Then we try to move him and he wakes up! There are times we laugh and say he is "playing opossum" because we know he's not really asleep. He loves to cuddle up right next to us on the bed though and take little siestas. Back to the music... He LOVES music. I remember feeling him really move around during the worship time at church when I was pregnant. We've been listening to the House Fires II album recently. He also seems to like to listen to stories. Amber and Trey went to Norway over fall break and brought him back a little cow finger puppet. This puppet has become the story teller. The cow (it still needs a name) tells Bible stories as well as other random stories fictional and non-fictional. Recently he's been making lots more little noises too. I've asked him questions and it's sometimes as if he's answering my questions with an "uh huh" or "uh uh" It's so cute to listen to him. His dimples are precious but that doesn't make me want to pinch his cheeks! I'm just strange like that though. Instead, it makes me want to kiss him and tell him I love him more than he knows. Some of the above things make me think he's older than he is, but that smile of his... oh, it gets me. Sometimes I think he is really smiling at me, but everything you read will say he has gas or it's just his reflexes.

Monday went to the pumpkin patch because it was Columbus day and Jeremy didn't have to work. This was his first outing (and actually got out) to a place other than to my parent's house or to the doctor. It was a foggy, cloudy day so it seemed perfect. I went to lunch with some friends because it was a teacher work day for them, then we got Jeremy's battery replaced in his car before heading to Washington Farms. When we got there the sun found the one hole in the sky without clouds and decided to stay there while we tried to take pictures. It was pretty much impossible. Oh well.

We've been told to stay away from crowds for about 6 weeks if not a little more since he was born during this time of the year. We were also asked to get flu shots (I got mine on Tuesday while Momma kept the little one and Jeremy got his on Thursday). I haven't gotten cabin fever or gone stir crazy yet, but when the time comes for more cold weather I might need some visitors to keep me company.

Week 3-4
It seems that this week has been a bit of a roller coaster. We started week 3 out with a fussy baby. Gas. Gas. Gas. The culprit- onions. I've made a pact not to eat onions for a while because having a miserable child is heartbreaking. On top of that, I only ate a few tablespoons on a hotdog. Oh well. No more. Then we had a bit of a scare. He started having a stuffy nose on Sunday. He didn't have a temperature though so that was good. We went to Costco on Saturday and he took his first trip into a store. Although he was covered by shades the whole time it still was a little nerve-racking. I assumed he was sick and that we would have to take him to the hospital. I'll admit I cried a little. We both prayed he would get better, but we also talked about how easy it was to get nervous about little kids which made us understand why people make decisions to take their children to the hospital at the drop of a dime. However, Jeremy did a little research and read about something called an estrogen crash, which he attributed the stuffy nose and the baby acne that popped up at the end of last week. We started running the humidifier, I used the nasal aspirator, and we kept doing what we had been doing and it cleared up. He then got to go to Miriam's house because I had a meeting at the school. She said he was good the whole time. Patton sang to him an taught him his colors. I love to see how people love on him. It makes me so happy. I was so nervous that he would be unhappy but he wasn't! She even took him through the car rider line to pick up Micah and he did well. YAY! He got to have Cindy watch him too while we went on a date to Red Lobster (I hadn't had fish in FOREVER so we decided it was time). The entire time we were gone, he stayed awake and they read some books and FaceTimed Jonathan and Kristi. Our baby announcements came in this week too. They are super cute! I've loved being at home with this little guy. The days seem to be over so quickly though. Originally I thought I would get a lot done at home, but that is quite a funny thing because things only get done in 1-5 minutes intervals. Laundry, dishes, vacuuming, and other chores take days if not hours to complete because I have to keep leaving it. Speaking of the above, everyone's heard of the phantom ring or phone vibration where they feel as if someone is calling/texting them. When they look at their phone, nothing. Well, this week started the phantom cry. Even if I try to take a shower for a few minutes, I constantly think he is crying and will turn off the shower.

This week: He loves his pacifier even more. Sometimes he will let out a whine to let you know it fell out of his mouth. He continues to fight sleep now and then. He likes to be near people and have them hold him or rock. He seems to prefer his side to his back. We make him sleep on his back but he will fall asleep so much easier when you are holding him. People made comments about his neck strength and head movement. That has surprised us since day 1. He always wants to look around and started following people with his eyes this week. He loves to take naps on Jeremy's stomach. He is inconsistent in his sleeping patterns at night. Sometimes it will only be 3 1/2 hours between feedings and other times it is between 4 and 6 1/2 hours. He's had lots more leaky diapers at night (read below in the diaper diaries to see why). He loves to eat. After the gas episode, he has gone back to his sweet self and isn't so fussy. He loves his hands being near his face and he has ever since his ultrasound pictures. He still loves music, worship music specifically. "Good Good Father" is his favorite off the Housefires II album. Acne decided it wanted to attack his face though so his cheeks and chin are filled with bumps.